Waiting

For some reason, I find that it's easier to blog when I'm waiting for something. Right now I'm waiting while my wife has surgery. It's nothing major so there's no need to worry and though I've told myself this time and time again, I can't help but wonder. I find myself thinking about how I would react if something were to go wrong. What would I do? How would I feel? How would I cope? It's at about this point that logic begins to kick in and I realize that there's no way that anything so terrible as losing my wife could result from this surgery. But, then accidents do happen. However, the chances are so slim that there's no need to worry. Then again, even though the chances are remote, there's still a chance. This has been my thought process for the past several days. Going back and forth, being worried then being reasonable. Needless to say, I'm looking forward for this all to be over so that I can get off of this emotional see-saw. In reality, the worst case scenario for this surgery isn't death, it's simply that it won't be successful. So, if that's the case, why can't I stop worrying? I must really care about my wife and truth be told, after all of the thinking that I've been doing, if I were to ever lose her, I wouldn't have any idea how I'd react or what I would do with myself. Sweetie, I love you. I will always be here for you and I pray that you'll do the same for me. I know that I can't ever say it enough, but I'll try ... I love you.